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	<title>Sita's musings &#187; personal musings</title>
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		<title>Sita's musings &#187; personal musings</title>
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		<title>Mengambil Pelajaran dari Perang Media Sosial: Pick Your Battles and Take the High Road</title>
		<link>http://sita.ismangil.com/2012/01/11/mengambil-pelajaran-dari-perang-media-sosial-pick-your-battles-and-take-the-high-road/</link>
		<comments>http://sita.ismangil.com/2012/01/11/mengambil-pelajaran-dari-perang-media-sosial-pick-your-battles-and-take-the-high-road/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Jan 2012 05:29:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sitaresmi</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Indonesia]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal musings]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Waduh, ternyata ibu artis 80-an ini belum bisa/tidak mau kehilangan kesempatan untuk terus berkicau di media sosial twitter bahkan menyeret nama artis lain di tahun 80-an dengan menyebar berita gak bener. Kalau melihat kicauan dalam akun twitternya, maka mungkin bisa &#8230; <a href="http://sita.ismangil.com/2012/01/11/mengambil-pelajaran-dari-perang-media-sosial-pick-your-battles-and-take-the-high-road/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=sita.ismangil.com&amp;blog=70577&amp;post=253&amp;subd=sitaresmi&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Waduh, ternyata ibu artis 80-an <a href="https://twitter.com/#!/HaqueMarissa">ini</a> belum bisa/tidak mau kehilangan kesempatan untuk terus berkicau di media sosial twitter bahkan menyeret nama artis lain di tahun 80-an dengan menyebar berita gak bener. Kalau melihat kicauan dalam akun <a href="https://twitter.com/#!/HaqueMarissa">twitternya</a>, maka mungkin bisa jadi bahan perkuliahan di fakultas-fakultas yang membahas perilaku manusia (atau makhluk hidup secara umum).</p>
<p>Dan, siapakah di antara kita yang tahan mendapatkan serangan terus-menerus tanpa henti? Kita kemudian memaklumi apabila <a href="https://twitter.com/#!/addiems">mas Addie MS</a>, <a href="https://twitter.com/#!/memes605">mbak Memes</a> dan putranya <a href="https://twitter.com/#!/apriliokevin">Kevin</a> mulai secara selektif menjawab kicauan dari si bu artis karena kelihatannya si bu artis belum mau berhenti kalau belum dijawab (sudah dijawabpun, beliau masih terus berkicau). Saya harus memberikan apresiasi setinggi-tingginya kepada keluarga mas Addie yang mewujudkan makna peribahasa bahasa inggris di judul posting ini: <em>Pick Your Battles</em>. <em>Take the High Road</em>. Pilih-pilihlah pertarungannya, kalau tidak perlu jangan diladeni, ambil jalan yang lebih terhormat. Selain itu, menyaksikan interaksi bapak-anak di era digital juga mengesankan, misalnya bagaimana mas Addie mengingatkan Kevin untuk tidak terpancing melalui tweetnya.</p>
<p>Hal yang tidak kalah menarik dan membesarkan hati adalah sikap dan perilaku kedua putri  si ibu artis yang sangat dewasa dan mampu menahan emosi. Bisakah kita membayangkan perasaan mereka melihat perilaku ibu mereka dan bagaimana &#8220;balasan&#8221; masyarakat yang juga sadis? Di sini, kita harus memberi penghargaan kepada kedua orang tua mereka (ya, termasuk ibunda mereka yang tercinta). <em>Their mama (and papa) raised them right</em>.</p>
<p>Sikap dan perilaku mas Addie, mbak Memes, Kevin, Bella dan Chikita menurut saya sudah ,mulai jarang kita temui. Menyimak tweet mereka, memberi harapan pada kita, bahwa tidak semua selebriti dan keluarganya di Jakarta, Indonesia hanya bersikap menebar sensasi.</p>
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		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
	
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			<media:title type="html">sitaresmi</media:title>
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		<title>Perang Media Sosial  yang Menyeret Nama Universitas</title>
		<link>http://sita.ismangil.com/2012/01/08/perang-media-sosial-yang-menyeret-nama-universitas/</link>
		<comments>http://sita.ismangil.com/2012/01/08/perang-media-sosial-yang-menyeret-nama-universitas/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 08 Jan 2012 13:24:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sitaresmi</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Indonesia]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal musings]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rants]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[teacher]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[work]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[logo universitas]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[nebeng]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Tahun baru, cerita lama, modus baru? Tadinya, saya cuma ikut ketawa melihat keributan yang ditimbulkan seorang artis tahun 80-an di beberapa blognya, antara lain di sini sambil bersimpati kepada universitas tetangga di Bogor. Bagaimana tidak, logo universitas diumbar sembarangan, nama &#8230; <a href="http://sita.ismangil.com/2012/01/08/perang-media-sosial-yang-menyeret-nama-universitas/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=sita.ismangil.com&amp;blog=70577&amp;post=250&amp;subd=sitaresmi&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Tahun baru, cerita lama, modus baru?</p>
<p>Tadinya, saya cuma ikut ketawa melihat keributan yang ditimbulkan seorang artis tahun 80-an di beberapa blognya, antara lain di <a href="http://marissa-haque-ipb.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">sini</a> sambil bersimpati kepada<a href="http://ipb.ac.id" target="_blank"> universitas tetangga</a> di Bogor. Bagaimana tidak, logo universitas diumbar sembarangan, nama seorang dekan diseret-seret nggak karuan. Tapi, itu memang resiko bagi anggota komunitas akademik (baca: dosen) yang memutuskan hadir di jejaring media sosial seperti <a title="facebook" href="http://facebook.com" target="_blank">facebook </a>atau <a title="Twitter" href="http://twitter.com" target="_blank">twitter</a>.</p>
<p>Jadi apa sumber keributannya?  Bisa buka salah satu blog si ibu artis (ada beberapa), seperti di atas, atau di <a href="http://marissahaque.blogdetik.com/" target="_blank">blogdetik</a>. Intinya, ibu artis marah karena gelar akademiknya yang terakhir dipertanyakan oleh seorang pengguna <a href="https://twitter.com/#!/DeeDeeKartika" target="_blank">twitter</a>. Oleh karena ibu artis ini sudah pernah mengamuk juga sebelumnya, maka pengguna twitter di Indonesia secara kolektif tertawa bersama, kecuali tentu yang namanya <a href="https://twitter.com/#!/addiems" target="_blank">ikut dibawa-bawa</a>. Tapi yang kenal si ibu, sudah &#8220;maklum&#8221; perilaku beliau, dan tidak ingin ikut ribut.</p>
<p>Lalu, kenapa saya yang sekarang ikut ribut? Kalau teman saya bilang &#8220;mau ngaku-ngaku titisan dewa, atau Cleopatra, silakan, tapi jangan menyeret almamater.&#8221; Ya, bapak/ibu/saudara, ternyata orang memang senang kalau ada afiliasi dengan PTN-PTN besar di Indonesia, (walau saya dengar, akhir-akhir ini, jadi &#8220;orang UI&#8221; justru mengundang pertanyaan <img src='http://s0.wp.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':-)' class='wp-smiley' />  Tapi itu untuk posting lain.). Jadi, kalau ada orang iseng membawa-bawa nama almamater, jelas gerah lah.</p>
<p>Kembali lagi ke masalah ibu artis vs seorang <a href="https://twitter.com/#!/DeeDeeKartika" target="_blank">tweep</a>, ternyata ada beberapa orang yang iseng-iseng mencoba cari latarbelakang orang yang disebut &#8220;kamseupay&#8221; oleh si ibu artis. Saya sendiri sudah familiar dengan orang tersebut dan tadinya tidak terlalu peduli karena menganggap beliau tidak penting, dan ingin nebeng &#8220;tenar&#8221; dengan kelompok dosen-dosen yang tergabung dalam gerakan #SAVEUI dan Perempuan Lintas Fakultas untuk Reformasi UI (PELITA UI).</p>
<p>Dan apa yang terjadi? Muncul sebuah akun twitter @PelitaUI, yang isinya mati-matian bela si tweep lulusan universitas Amsterdam, bahkan secara berseri menuliskan riwayat kuliah ibu lulusan universitas Amsterdam. Kalau isinya cuma itu, plus beberapa orasi ilmiah pengajar UI yang tergabung dalam #SAVE UI dan Pelita UI, ya silakan. Tapi hari ini, saya periksa, dan muncul tweet-tweet seperti ini:</p>
<p>1. &#8220;Seluruh Pengajar <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/SaveUI" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>SaveUI</strong></a> dan <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/PelitaUI" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>PelitaUI</strong></a> adalah lulusan UI yg sahih <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/DeeDeeKartika" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>DeeDeeKartika</strong></a> <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/tamrintomagola" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>tamrintomagola</strong></a> <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/_Baso_" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>_Baso_</strong></a>&#8220;</p>
<p>2.Tapi yg tergabung dalam <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/SaveUI" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>SaveUI</strong></a> dan <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/PelitaUI" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>PelitaUI</strong></a> sahih karena kami lulus sebelum masa Gumilar <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/tamrintomagola" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>tamrintomagola</strong></a> <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/DeeDeeKartika" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>DeeDeeKartika</strong></a> <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/_baso_" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>_baso_</strong></a></p>
<p>Dan yang sudah bersifat fitnah, menurut saya adalah tweet ini, yang me-reply pertanyaan seorang alumni yang lulus pada periode 2007-2011:</p>
<p>&#8220;Gumilar banyak menerima mahasiswa baru jalur undangan yg tdk berkualitas <a href="https://twitter.com/#%21/bebe_silhouette" rel="nofollow"><s>@</s><strong>bebe_silhouette</strong></a>: Saya lulus era Bpk Gumilar, ada bedanya ya Bu?&#8221;</p>
<p>Hohohoho, mohon maaf, boleh berpandangan miring terhadap Pak Rektor, silakan lapor kepada BPK, KPK, ICW, dan berbagai institusi lain, tapi mempertanyakan kualitas input UI secara umum pada periode Pak Gumilar menurut saya adalah suatu penghinaan terhadap institusi UI. Kalau mau ngecek daftar mahasiswa yang diterima selama periode Pak Gumilar sampai saat ini (2008-2011), tolong cek ke Direktorat Pendidikan. Jangan main tweet yang seperti itu. BPK juga melakukan pengecekan kok selama audit di UI dengan secara random menelpon orang tua mahasiswa untuk cross check berita tentang uang masuk di UI.</p>
<p>Dosen UI jumlahnya sekitar 1800-an. Tidak dosen semua tergabung dalam kelompok #SAVEUI atau Pelita UI. Tidak semua dosen punya akun Facebook atau Twitter. Tapi itu tidak berarti bahwa dosen-dosen tersebut tidak bekerja keras untuk menghasilkan lulusan yang kompeten. Mungkin malah mereka lebih kerja keras karena tidak sibuk main twitter *wink*. Membuat pernyataan seperti itu di sebuah media sosial seperti twitter, sungguh tidak mencerminkan perilaku akademik.</p>
<p>Jadi #SAVEUI, Pelita UI tolong deh, kendalikan anggotanya. Orang yang peduli UI bukan cuma kelompok anda.</p>
<p>[Crosspost dari blog saya di UI karena penting bagi saya]</p>
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			<media:title type="html">sitaresmi</media:title>
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		<title>Blurring Reality Lines</title>
		<link>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/12/05/blurring-reality-lines/</link>
		<comments>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/12/05/blurring-reality-lines/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 04 Dec 2011 23:02:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sitaresmi</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[just for fun]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal musings]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Sometimes, the line between what&#8217;s real and what&#8217;s fiction get blurred. Example: a telephone conversation with my brother about our Dad&#8217;s recent diagnosis for  prostate cancer Me: &#8220;Oncologists have different opinions on the treatment. We need to talk to more &#8230; <a href="http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/12/05/blurring-reality-lines/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=sita.ismangil.com&amp;blog=70577&amp;post=247&amp;subd=sitaresmi&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Sometimes, the line between what&#8217;s real and what&#8217;s fiction get blurred. Example: a telephone conversation with my brother about our Dad&#8217;s recent diagnosis for  prostate cancer</p>
<p>Me: <em>&#8220;Oncologists have different opinions on the treatment. We need to talk to more than one.&#8221;</em></p>
<p><em></em>Brother: <em>&#8220;We need to talk to (dr) Wilson.&#8221;</em></p>
<p><em></em>And just who is Dr Wilson? He&#8217;s a great doctor, empathizes with patients, does his research. Only problem is that he&#8217;s a doctor on the TV series &#8220;House&#8221;.</p>
<p>Yes people, my family definitely watches too much TV.</p>
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		<title>If you get a second (or third) chance in life (or love)&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/10/05/if-you-get-a-second-or-third-chance-in-life-or-love/</link>
		<comments>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/10/05/if-you-get-a-second-or-third-chance-in-life-or-love/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 05 Oct 2011 01:07:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sitaresmi</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[personal musings]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://sitaresmi.wordpress.com/2011/10/05/if-you-get-a-second-or-third-chance-in-life-or-love/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8230; Who are we to deny our heart, our feelings? The time we have on this earth is short so let us cherish the moments we have.<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=sita.ismangil.com&amp;blog=70577&amp;post=244&amp;subd=sitaresmi&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&#8230; Who are we to deny our heart, our feelings?</p>
<p> The time we have on this earth is short so let us cherish the moments we have.</p>
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		<title>What keeps you going?</title>
		<link>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/09/25/what-keeps-you-going/</link>
		<comments>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/09/25/what-keeps-you-going/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 25 Sep 2011 00:29:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sitaresmi</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Indonesia]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal musings]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://sitaresmi.wordpress.com/2011/09/25/what-keeps-you-going/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[What keeps you going, after losing everything you have? Yesterday I received some horrible news about a friend. Her house burned down in the middle of the night, along with the family owned bakery, and their cars. According to the &#8230; <a href="http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/09/25/what-keeps-you-going/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=sita.ismangil.com&amp;blog=70577&amp;post=243&amp;subd=sitaresmi&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>What keeps you going, after losing everything you have? </p>
<p>Yesterday I received some horrible news about a friend. Her house burned down in the middle of the night, along with the family owned bakery, and their cars. According to the news nothing could be saved. Luckily they were no human casualities. My friend and husband were out of town, and the one child inside the house managed to escape the inferno.</p>
<p>What keeps you going? Faith, for one thing.</p>
<p>Another thing? A sense of humor no doubt. When I commented on her recent posting to facebook she said &#8220;Life seems so simple when all is left is one laptop, one harddrive, one mobile phone, one backpack and one handbag. What a wonderful world, he he&#8221;</p>
<p>What a wonderful world indeed if we can all see the hopeful side of things.</p>
<p><em>Dedicated to ibu Meis in Manado. Thoughts and prayers with you and your family.</em></p>
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		<title>Life with Dad: &#8220;You&#8217;re my kid, after all&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/07/15/life-with-dad-youre-my-kid-after-all/</link>
		<comments>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/07/15/life-with-dad-youre-my-kid-after-all/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 15 Jul 2011 01:43:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sitaresmi</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[personal musings]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://sitaresmi.wordpress.com/2011/07/15/life-with-dad-youre-my-kid-after-all/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[You know, I don&#8217;t think I ever gave my Dad proper credit for his influence in my life. There have been ups (and a down) when I think about our relationship.  But lately I&#8217;ve found myself thinking and saying &#8220;well &#8230; <a href="http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/07/15/life-with-dad-youre-my-kid-after-all/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=sita.ismangil.com&amp;blog=70577&amp;post=242&amp;subd=sitaresmi&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>You know, I don&#8217;t think I ever gave my Dad proper credit for his influence in my life. There have been ups (and a down) when I think about our relationship.  But lately I&#8217;ve found myself thinking and saying &#8220;well my Dad taught me&#8230;&#8221; Maybe it&#8217;s because Mom&#8217;s not around anymore.</p>
<p>Dad is always paranoid about being late for travel. His motto is always &#8220;better to wait at the airport&#8221; many times arriving way early.</p>
<p>This morning. I had to catch a flight at 09.30 AM. The Jakarta traffic being what it is (aka murder-by-macet) I opted to leave at 6.00 from Dad&#8217;s. As I was kinda regretting the decision Dad said &#8220;better be early and wait there. You&#8217;re my kid, after all.&#8221;</p>
<p>Then I realized his paranoia has rubbed off on me <img src='http://s0.wp.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':-)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p>Dad,  you&#8217;ve taught me well.</p>
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		<title>My horoscope today: good advice!</title>
		<link>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/06/20/my-horoscope-today-good-advice/</link>
		<comments>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/06/20/my-horoscope-today-good-advice/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 20 Jun 2011 04:13:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sitaresmi</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[personal musings]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rants]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sita.ismangil.com/?p=234</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Just because you have a strong opinion about how to do something at work, your certainty doesn&#8217;t make your idea the best way. Being open to learning from others requires you to let go of your attachment to being right. &#8230; <a href="http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/06/20/my-horoscope-today-good-advice/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=sita.ismangil.com&amp;blog=70577&amp;post=234&amp;subd=sitaresmi&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Just because you have a strong opinion about how to do something at work, your certainty doesn&#8217;t make your idea the best way. Being open to learning from others requires you to let go of your attachment to being right. Forget about proving your superiority; instead, acknowledge that everyone has something special to offer. Respectfully asking your co-workers to share their knowledge and expertise is a sign of your own intelligence.</p>
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		<title>What to do on a Mother-less Mother&#8217;s Day</title>
		<link>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/05/08/what-to-do-on-a-mother-less-mothers-day/</link>
		<comments>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/05/08/what-to-do-on-a-mother-less-mothers-day/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 08 May 2011 01:52:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sitaresmi</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[personal musings]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://sita.ismangil.com/?p=235</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The 1st thought was drown myself in sorrow, thinking of my late mom and thinking of the fact that I&#8217;m not a mom. The 2nd thought was slapping myself internally,because I&#8217;m not the only person in the world without a &#8230; <a href="http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/05/08/what-to-do-on-a-mother-less-mothers-day/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=sita.ismangil.com&amp;blog=70577&amp;post=235&amp;subd=sitaresmi&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The 1st thought was drown myself in sorrow, thinking of my late mom and thinking of the fact that I&#8217;m not a mom.</p>
<p>The 2nd thought was slapping myself internally,because I&#8217;m not the only person in the world without a mother and not a mom.</p>
<p>The 3rd thought was OK, wallow for 5 minutes, blog about it, then move on.</p>
<p>Right. 5 minutes over.</p>
<p>Moving on.</p>
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		<title>Careful, your face might freeze that way!</title>
		<link>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/04/27/careful-your-face-might-freeze-that-way/</link>
		<comments>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/04/27/careful-your-face-might-freeze-that-way/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 27 Apr 2011 01:03:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sitaresmi</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Indonesia]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal musings]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://sitaresmi.wordpress.com/?p=232</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Stop making weird faces&#8230;your face might freeze that way. I am not sure who actually said this, but I often hear/read this saying. And you know what? I think its kinda true. I have some friends who somehow think that &#8230; <a href="http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/04/27/careful-your-face-might-freeze-that-way/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=sita.ismangil.com&amp;blog=70577&amp;post=232&amp;subd=sitaresmi&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><em>Stop making weird faces&#8230;your face might freeze that way.</em></p>
<p>I am not sure who actually said this, but I often hear/read this saying. And you know what? I think its kinda true.</p>
<p>I have some friends who somehow think that a day without complaining is a day wasted. Their faces seem to be stuck in a perpetual long face, unsmiling, often scowling.</p>
<p>So folks, be careful. Stop putting on a negative face, it might just freeze that way.</p>
<p>Smile!!!</p>
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		<title>Why does it feel different this time?</title>
		<link>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/04/21/why-does-it-feel-different-this-time/</link>
		<comments>http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/04/21/why-does-it-feel-different-this-time/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 21 Apr 2011 08:18:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>sitaresmi</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Indonesia]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[Having been part of university management this past decade has often put me in situations where the &#8220;management&#8221; is seemingly portrayed as some kinda of &#8220;bad guy&#8221; trying to disturb the haven of academic society in the university. In all &#8230; <a href="http://sita.ismangil.com/2011/04/21/why-does-it-feel-different-this-time/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=sita.ismangil.com&amp;blog=70577&amp;post=230&amp;subd=sitaresmi&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Having been part of university management this past decade has often put me in situations where the &#8220;management&#8221; is seemingly portrayed as some kinda of &#8220;bad guy&#8221; trying to disturb the haven of academic society in the university.</p>
<p>In all situations, I have enjoyed support of my direct superiors whenever faced with people who, hmm, don&#8217;t quite understand the decisions made in the university.</p>
<p>That is, until this weekend when a direct superior posted a scathing email in the staff mailing list, questioning the motives of a selection committee that I am a member of.</p>
<p>Honestly, the email felt like a punch in the gut. Of course close friends told me to ignore this email, and to move on. Of course we move on, but not before sending out a reply keeping emotions in check through gritted teeth.</p>
<p>You know, it wasn&#8217;t the first provocative I&#8217;d ever received. But this one caught me off guard, because it came from a direct superior, who I just met the day before and said practically nothing. Instead, the person decided to ruin a weekend by sending out an email basically accusing the committee of trying to ruin the collegial atmosphere, and challenging us to come up with better rules and regulations.</p>
<p>I would&#8217;ve accepted this &#8220;public&#8221; scolding if I hadn&#8217;t shown the rules and regulations the previous day. I had presented the draft and received a quiet assent. And yet, the following day, came the ridiculous email. This person had crossed the fine line of governing and politicking. </p>
<p>99% of the time, I can ignore emails like that. This was the 1% that I couldn&#8217;t. This time, it felt different because the person who did the provoking was a direct superior.</p>
<p>And that my friends, shows the quality of a leader. You deal the issues when YOU face them, and not by sending a public email to the staff mailing list. </p>
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